Despite intense lobbying efforts by the interior design and art lobby, Congress is considering reducing the color wheel by one hue, blue. Fiscal conservatives are quoting studies that show there would be substantial savings across the board in inks, dyes and pigments of all kinds. Millions could be saved in the government printing office alone.
Air Force officials in the Pentagon are raising a great hue and cry, declaring that it uniformly neutralizes one complete branch of the armed services. Not to mention it makes a mockery out of the air force theme song, “Into the Wild Blue Yonder”.
“Why we would have to sing Into the Wild Yonder!” blustered an obviously apoplectic unnamed Pentagon staffer.
Art experts say the elimination of blue will result in the overall warming of the color wheel. That has alarmed environmentalists who are already worried about the effects of global warming on this blue orb.
House and Senate sub-commitees are meeting to discuss options available to them. The head of the National Endowment for the Arts has been called to the Hill to testify. There are already calls for the compromise on the ban on blue.
One anonymous source is quoted as saying,”Maybe we could just lighten it a bit. ”
Alarmist voices across the aisle say this potential legislation may lead one day to Monochromaticism, where there may be the elimination of all color.
Bobby Leadscrawler, Faux Art NewsÂ
