Can you believe it? Another year has flown by, who would have predicted that? It is freezing outside. I am inside and am warming up by the fire in my mystic castle up here in the heart of Nadaland.
The Art Psychic bus is broke down and I had to drop the tranny to get it overhauled for my 2011 Art Psychic Bus Tour. I think I barked a knuckle on that last bolt.
At long last, here are my prognostications.
Predictions for 2011
-Rational thought is found to be a fraud and is finally debunked. Art psychics become popular again.
-Art researchers discover that the pictographs on cliffs in the desert southwest depicting antelope, deer, and bear were not made by hunters but by their mates, as grocery lists.
-Thomas Kindcaide will disappear from the public arena but resurfaces at Burning Man dressed as Jesus. Failing to ascend to heaven he gets in a limo and speeds away.
-NBC archivists will find 12 lost episodes of Seinfeld that were never aired. YES! Television is an art form. Episodes of Murder She Wrote will also be discovered but prudently lost again.
-Educators will discover that kids like art better than algebra. There will be a nationwide push to eliminate math from schools.
-Large creaking and groaning sounds will be heard throughout the world. It will turn out to be the first indications of fractures in the internet. Pen and pencil prices spike.
-The economy will rebound led by a resurgence in art buying. No, not really, just yanking your chain. Everything else in this column will really happen.
The Art Psychic